I'm a perfectionist

As the title says it, I am a perfectionist.

They say your road to recovery starts when you admit your problem and here I am doing just that.
Being a perfectionist and aiming high is what has gotten me where I am today and what has made me the way I am.

I like who I am but being a perfectionist also means that I aim high all the time and I want to be better all the time, and this can make me feel down, and never be completely happy, which sucks.

Let's say I win Bronze at something, if it was someone else I would tell them "Congrats! That's great!" but if it's me, I would be disappointed and think "Why the heck wasn't I able to get Gold, at least Silver would have been better!".

I do this all the time, it's terrible really, I am actually my worst enemy.

This blog stems from that perfectionism, it's anonymous because as a perfectionist that I am I don't like people to know my flaws,  mainly because I feel ashamed of them, not because I want to be better than everyone else. I am hoping that here I will be able to write what comes to my mind and not worry what people think about what I write reflecting on who I am.

I don't want to not be a perfectionist, otherwise I wouldn't aim high but at the same time I would like to be really happy about what I do achieve. I know, it's kind of contradictory.

Maybe one day I will be able to let go and tell everyone who I am, or maybe one day I will become highly successful and never be able to reveal my true identity in fear of the media! *chuckles*

What about you? Can you keep the right balance between motivation and contentment?

What should I do?

A place to let go

I created this blog as a place to let go, let go of my thoughts, my fears and expose my wishes and desires.

A place where I can be free to say what I want without the fear of not being perfect.

I called it a girls secret diary, I know in age I am a woman, but I don't feel comfortable yet calling myself that... feels weird.

Wouldn't you love a place just to let go?